Tuesday, July 16, 2013

The South Plays By Different Rules

You'd think I wouldn't be too surprised by the South when I hear about it's behind-the-times behavior, given that I was floored when hearing the news of a school in Georgia holding it's first integrated prom in 2002 and the frightening amount of food they expect you to eat.

However, I managed to let the ways of the South rock me once again.

A good friend of mine was born and raised in a small rural town in Mississippi. He speaks with the thickest of accents, despite his living in California for over a decade. It runs that deep.

Regardless, one breezy star-lit evening, we were lounging on the patio, sharing beers, laughter and stories. After awhile, our narratives began to hold an underlying theme: high school.

We laughed at ourselves and how we acted, when my friend steps in to spin a tale of his own youthful experience. He was playing the factious student in this story and referred to a teacher by her first name in the middle of a class. When some more liberal teachers might only correct a student, it's a much bigger offense in the South. He was sent to the principal's office. Not to receive a scolding. Not to receive a detention. But, instead, to receive three licks. That's right, a paddle to the ass. He graduated high school in 2003.

So, that's a thing.

My mind immediately reverted to a Dazed and Confused scene. Kids running around like chickens with their heads cut off, doing whatever it takes to avoid the slaughter from the paddle. I find it hard to believe someone in my own generation was getting, not hits, but licks. Even in 2013, Mississippi, along with many other states, still carry out corporal punishment in schools.

At first, you imagine the many times throughout your childhood you most likely would have taken a beating. But, because I was an angel of a child and never in trouble, I would have remained untouched, naturally.

In case you're wondering, I'm researching the laws against using the paddle in your own home on your own children. Good luck to those guys.

                                          ^ this proves that the paddle can also be used for pleasure

Thanks for soundin' down.


A catechism ( /ˈkætəkɪzəm/; Ancient Greek: κατηχισμός from kata = "down" + echein = "to sound", literally "to sound down" (into the ears), is a summary or exposition of doctrine, traditionally used inChristian religious teaching from New Testament times to the present.[1] Catechisms are doctrinal manuals often in the form of questions followed by answers to be memorized, a format that has been used in non-religious or secular contexts as well