|This is mysterious photo|
I was asked for my expertise on how to keep above Basil alive, and realized that I sort of don't know. So, as promised, I kept note of the daily adventures of Basil and am reporting back.
Day 1 | 9:00:00
Plant was purchased yesterday from location Trader Joe's. I did not know said Trader Businessman sold plants. Do I trust Joe? What does he trade other than Basil? Basil (bæz.l) has been sitting on table doing nothing. Smells pungent.
Day 2 | 12:00:00Basil plant looks shockingly similar. I have done nothing to better or worsen it. A good sign. I ate some this morning. Tasted basily.
Day 3 | 9:00:00I ate Basil again. It was good. He did not scream.
Day 4 | 15:00:00I learned one has to water once a week and not leave in direct sunlight. This new information is vital and will be taken into serious consideration, provided I don't forget about plant.
Day 5 | 10:00:00My roommate has been taking care of Basil. The demise of plant is no longer on my shoulders. Still watching. Things look remarkably the same.
Day 9 | 18:00:00I left dear Basil for a holiday. I feel as though Basil became angry and sad in my absence, emotion from which he may never recover. He looks wilted and brownish. Is it possible dear Basil is dying? I called urgent care and they asked me how old my cat was. I don't think they were listening. A short Haiku.
Basil was once so bright
Now his poor leaves curl and wilt
Don't trust Trader Joes
|The beginning of the end. I didn't want you to remember him in a worse state.|
Day 10 | 9:00:00I ripped what remaining sad sustenance poor Basil had to give. I put it on my eggs. It tasted as sad as it looked. Goodbye, dear Basil.
He's a Traitor Joe alright.
Thanks for soundin' down..