Wednesday, November 4, 2015


To begin putting into words the day Blake and I got married seems insufficient. Too many tear-soaked tissues, so many warm embraces, and all the love I could ever feel from friends, family, and, particularly, my husband.

That's still strange to say.

But, now that I'm an old married woman, I feel compelled to give you my very own, I-know-what-I'm-talking-about, wedding advice.

When Blake and I got engaged, the advice train started rolling in. Some bad, some strange, and some very much accepted, because, let's be honest, I had no idea what I was doing. Usually when you get married, you haven't done it before, so, therefore, you are completely lost. And as someone who prides herself on her quick research skills, I turned to where we all turn to for advice in 2015; the internet.

And apparently weddings are a big deal on the internet. Blogs, Pinterest articles, and Instagram posts are vomiting detail ideas, dresses, and things you should be doing for your wedding day and how your ideas just aren't as good.

I will admit, finding ideas was very helpful via the internet. There were many helpful outlets through my research. But there were also some very unhelpful and unnecessary outlets on ideas and mostly advice.

"25 Things You Should Do Before You Get Married."

"What Your Dress Says About You."

"Hope You've Picked the Right Flowers, Or You Might Get Divorced."

Okay, so that last one isn't real.

But, I get it. Getting married is a big deal. You want to make sure the centerpieces are on point, that the seating chart won't cause drama, and that, of course, your dress is perfect. And when I started planning our wedding, I realized something.

I had never dreamed of my perfect wedding. I never had a certain church in mind. I never had the dress that I couldn't live without. I never needed things to be a specific way in order for my day to be perfect.

It takes months of planning, thousands of dollars, and possibly a few breakdowns to pull off one day. Just one day. And, like everyone warned me, it flew by.

But the planning ebbed and flowed. Some if it was easy, because I didn't have details in mind. And some of it was hard, because I didn't have details in mind. And after everything has blown over, I've decided to give my advice to anyone with upcoming nuptials, dream wedding or no dream wedding.

  1. It's your day, so you can do what the fuck you want to do.
  2. It may offend sending pity invites to your B-list because your A-listers RSVP'd no. Just, no.
  3. If something is important to you, make it a priority, and don't let others' priorities affect you.
  4. Unless you had Cupids fashioned out of real babies, no one will remember your centerpieces.
  5. You're there to get married to the love of your life, and that's the most important part. No matter what.
  6. If you don't agree with number 5, reevaluate.
  7. It's a lot of build up for what seems like a blink of the eye, so remember to take it in, have a drink (or 5), and dance.
    And finally, (This was the best piece of advice to be given to me)
  8. If someone offers to help you, even with something small, TAKE THEIR HELP.

I would love to relive that day over and over, but I am glad the planning (and paying) is over. I am still reeling in all the love from everyone who got to be a part of it, and all of those who sent their wishes from afar. It was a teary, beautiful ceremony, and a mosh-pit of a dance party. Somethings I hope to never forget, and some I will probably never remember.

Thanks for soundin' down,
Mrs. O'Brien